Have you ever gone shopping with a close friend, perhaps for clothing or an accessory, and found yourself torn between two equally appealing options? Unable to decide, you’ll most likely hand the responsibility to your friend: “Which should I pick?” Psychologists describe this as cognitive load reduction—the desire to pick the best and the fear of bearing responsibility for a potentially wrong choice. Interestingly, this human tendency mirrors a deeper spiritual truth about guidance and trust.

Although God has granted humanity the unrestricted right to choose and never violates that freedom, He consistently invites us to ask Him. Not because He wishes to control our decisions, but because He knows what is best for us: “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you… thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope” (Jeremiah 29:11). I have observed that men and women who rise to remarkable heights in life often share this quiet secret: they consciously seek God’s counsel when it seems like it and when not. This is not passive waiting or irresponsibility cloaked in spirituality; it is deliberate dependence, an honest pursuit of divine perspective before decisive action.

Scripture affirms this posture: “He shall choose our inheritance for us, the excellency of Jacob whom He loved” (Psalm 47:4). Many of us can recount moments when our choices led to regret—decisions we wish we could revisit with the wisdom we now possess. I recall my early days at the university, where I made two friends, though convenient and seemingly harmless, were the beginning of potential evil and naughtiness to come. They were both course mates and happened to reside very close to where I lived, so as expected, we went out together and came in together. Having had a strong Christian foundation, I always knew where to draw the line, but I was constantly caught in the web and cycles of guilt, trying to dissociate from them. How I disengaged from them remains a testimony to me till this day.

Another defining moment occurred as I prepared to advance to senior secondary school. Though I felt a strong inclination toward the sciences, I desired confirmation that it aligned with God’s purpose for me. I set aside three days to fast and seek clarity. God’s assurance echoed through Scriptures telling me to ‘go forward’, which I am enjoying the benefits of today. God never leads astray.

Scripture provides compelling precedents for this kind of God-dependent decision-making. When Abraham sought a wife for Isaac, he entrusted the choice entirely to God. He declared with confidence that the Lord would send His angel ahead: “The Lord God of heaven, which took me from my father’s house, and from the land of my kindred, and which spake unto me, and that sware unto me, saying, Unto thy seed will I give this land; he shall send his angel before thee, and thou shalt take a wife unto my son from thence” (Genesis 24:7). To prove it was God’s choice and not Abraham or the servant’s match making, the servant prayed also, “O LORD God of my master Abraham, I pray thee, send me good speed this day, and shew kindness unto my master Abraham. Behold, I stand here by the well of water; and the daughters of the men of the city come out to draw water: And let it come to pass, that the damsel to whom I shall say, Let down thy pitcher, I pray thee, that I may drink; and she shall say, Drink, and I will give thy camels drink also: let the same be she that thou hast appointed for thy servant Isaac; and thereby shall I know that thou hast shewed kindness unto my master” (Genesis 24:12-14). While this “fleece” is not prescriptive models for how God always leads, the sincerity of the servant’s heart was unquestionable, and God chose Rebecca.

Similarly, in the early church, while the apostles sought a replacement for Judas Iscariot, despite nominating Barsabbas and Matthias, refused to finalise the decision without prayer: “Thou, Lord, which knows the hearts of all men, shew whether of these two thou hast chosen” (Acts 1:23–26).

Life is much the same. When navigating unfamiliar terrain, we instinctively pause to ask for directions. In the same way, those who pursue God’s purpose, rather than personal ambition, will consistently stop at crossroads to seek His counsel. Scripture captures this beautifully: “Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths” (Proverbs 3:5–6).

True wisdom is not merely the ability to choose, but the humility to ask God before choosing.